Let's Not Shit Ourselves.

so this was a myspace bulletin today.

Fri, 01 Jun 2007 23:10:01 GMT

• give her one of your t-shirts to sleep in.
• give her one of your hoodies to wear so everyone knows shes yours.
• leave her cute text/notes.
• tell her she looks beautiful.-certain boy does this.
• look into her eyes when you talk to her.-certain boy does this
• let her mess with your hair.-certain boy does this
• touch her hair.-certain boy does this
• just walk around with her.-certain boy does this
• FORGIVE her for her MISTAKES.-BOY DID THIS AND I'M SO GLAD
• look at her like she's the only girl you see.-certain boy does this
• tickle her even when she says stop.-certain boy does this
• when she starts swearing at you, tell her you love her.
• let her fall asleep in your arms.
• get her mad, then kiss her.-certain boy did this
• stay on the phone with her even if shes not saying anything-certain boy does this everyday.
• tease her and let her tease you back.-certain boy does this
• stay up all night with her when she's sick.
• watch her favorite movie with her.
• let her wear your clothes.
• when she's sad, hang out with her.-certain boy does this
• let her know she's important.-certain boy does this
• kiss her in the pouring rain.-certain boy did this. C:
• when you fall in love with her, tell her.-certain boy told me this.
• and when you tell her, love her like you've never loved
someone before.-certain boy confessed to this.
• and,when she runs up at you crying...the first thing you say is..."who's ass am i beating today?-certain boy did this yesterday on the phone.

i love "fishey fishey".
thanks kyle. :D

Sat, 28 Apr 2007 02:17:51 GMT

I love how he surprised me outside of gildersleeve tonight.
<3

Allison needs to hurry up and told me what she found out.

SUESSICAL.

Fri, 27 Apr 2007 01:36:27 GMT

oh my god.
I love tonight so much.
It's not even funny how much I love tonight.

Like, honestly.
Number one: I think I did pretty good.
Number two: I had a fansection.
Number three: Brendan made me laugh to myself and smile when I forgot to onstage. He waved his phone around and made little hearts at me.
Number four: Megen was happy.
Number five: Hayley was there.
Number six: Chloe made something for me.
Number seven: Apelt was proud.
Number eight: Colton was there<3

I LOVE OPENING NIGHT.

...

Thu, 26 Apr 2007 00:34:29 GMT

I

HATE

HORMONES.

KTHX.

thx colton.

Sat, 31 Mar 2007 18:01:29 GMT

eh.
life is okay at best.

I mean, I still don't understand hayley, but she doesn't seem to get that ignoring me isn't going to get her[or me] anywhere. sometimes I want to just give up.

but otherwise, this break should be fun.
haircut in two days.
:D

Fri, 16 Mar 2007 20:21:39 GMT

I BROKE UP WITH MY OBSESSIVE BOYFRIEND!
He asked me how i slept.
and how he was going to find me.
i was like
weird, much?

so yeah.
it's over.
:D

Thu, 15 Mar 2007 01:07:35 GMT

STATUS: TAKEN!<3

Social Studies Projects.

Tue, 13 Mar 2007 00:57:06 GMT

I think we should all boycott them.
I mean, seriously.
Why do we do these things??
stupid really.
Brochures about the government?
You've got to be kidding me.
Yeah frickin right.

Anyways, I've had this weird obsession with sing the sorrow today.
But. I really really like The Leaving Song[s] and This Time Imperfect, which got lumped with ...But Home in Nowhere.

For me it's ...But Home IS Nowhere.
Even though secretly, I live in Chicago. XD

Still happy.
How long will it last...?

Oh, and
I'M LAYING DOWN THE LAW. THIS IS HOW IT'S GONNA BE.
ilu night.

Sat, 24 Feb 2007 20:18:52 GMT

Sooo.
This week's been really good. I mean, like, seriously.
Today was Suessical, which Megen went to too. And we had fun and stuff.

Except her and her jerky friend gavin kept making fun of me when we had to dance and shit.
DX

And yesterday Mr. Harris ate Brendan 'cause he was 'emo'.
And kept putting his hood up.

Andd.
I want to DDR at the mall really bad.

A Dead Language for a Dying Lady.

Sat, 03 Feb 2007 15:52:31 GMT

So here it goes:

I hate this. I want to trust my bestfriend, I want not to have everything be a comeptetion, I want not to bawl everytime I hear a Fall Out Boy song, I want not to like Brendan. All I want is for things to go back to last June. Maybe a rewind button, so I could fix mistakes and have a very happy and nice life right now.

I swear, I'm going to go crazy or work up the nerve to start cutting myself. I always feel like I have to puke, and I just don't care about nearly anything anymore. All I ever want to do is be with Brendan or be holed up in my room, listening to my iPod and prentending to be asleep. I only get maybe three solid hours of sleep nowadays. It's pathetic and I'm pathetic. Maybe if I trusted anybody enough, I could tell them all this directly. But unfortunately I don't. Haylee and Square Bear lied to me that one time, I and I can't let of that. It actually made me cut my ankles a few times and I cried so much I threw up. To have two people that I trusted the most do that to me SUCKED. That's why I don't trust any of you anymore. I trust Taylor. I sorta trust Brendan and Heather. Not really Hayley, not SB, DEFINITELY not Lindsey, and not ever Kaeley or Grace, completely. I'm always paranoid that they're going to turn around and lie to me or hurt me.

Stick a knife in my heart, eh?
"Let me let you in on a little secret; you've been talking to Hayley the whole time!"
"I like Tiney."
"...I think I might like Brendan again. :/"
"Me and my bestest friend Haylee..."
I think I'm dead. Yeah, I remember all that shit WORD FOR WORD. The only people I've been able to really fall back on this year have been Taylor, Amanda, and recently Ryan[Drischeler].

So If any of you were wondering, I hope this cleared some shit up. I mean, really. This year has KILLED me. I can't listen to Patrick's voice without remembering Haylee's insults. Panic without feeling Brendan hug me. Pete's bass without Lindsey calling me a selfish bitch. I mean, really, is asking for people not to backstab me being a selfish bitch? You wonder why I'm so fucked up? Here you go.

All tis fighting was STUPID anyways. About nothing. You know what doesn't help? HORMONES, THAT'S WHAT.

I mean, FIVE HOURS, and Brendan treats me like I'm the most important girl in the world, like I'm his girlfriend. Then He's back to being my best friend. WTF? NOT FUCKING HELPING.

And neither are my parents, always breaking promises and making me feel worthless.

YOU ALL MAKE ME WANT TO GO SLICE MY SHINS OPEN, YOU KNOW THAT? I'VE DONE IT A FEW TIMES WHEN YOU REALLY JUST SAID SOMETHING OR DID SOMETHING THAT MADE ME LOSE MY TRUST IN YOU. I'VE GOTTEN REALLY CLOSE TO DOING IT MORE. I'VE HAD THE URGE TO IN CLASS, AT HOME, HELL, SOMETIMES I DREAM ABOUT IT! BUT NORMALLY, I DON'T ACTUALLY DO IT! YOU KNOW WHY? BECAUSE. I KNOW I REALLY COULD DIE. AND I WANT TO END THIS HELLHOLE OF A LIFE HAPPILY, AND DOING SOMETHING FUN OR WHAT NOT, NOT CRYING IN MY BATHROOM!

So thanks. Maybe I'll go hibernate for a few hours. :/

Oh, and maybe cry some to Honorable Mention.
Haylee, I want to have you earn my trust back. I want to NOT feel like it USED to be us against the world, I want it to BE usa agianst the world. Maybe next time I'll remember not to tell you something stupid like I'll never leave your side.
You ditched me for Lindsey. Chicago, everything.
ME:"What about us?"
LINDSEY:"We already decided we're leaving you behind.
HAYLEY:"Yeah, you're on your own."
I wish I could sleep through my memories, because to me, deciet really does have ways of sticking around. And everytime you and Linds are together, I really do want to disappear. I turned to From First to Last because I could connect deeply to the songs and because they didn't remind me of how things used to be between us.
I mean, I was listening to my iPod on shuffle last night, and suddenly Nobody Puts Baby in the Corner comes on, and I start crying my eyes out because I remembered us singing it in the car going to VBS and Water Country. I mean, I could feel everyting, and remember it. The sunblock and bathing suits and t shirts and shorts over them, and the weather, smells, everything. I cried so hard I almost threw up.

I just hope you take your beaten, damaged, worse for the wear, paranoid, hurt best friend back.
</3

To:

Wed, 31 Jan 2007 21:08:34 GMT

two jerks who think they're the supreme beings.

GET OVER YOURSELVES.

Thanks.

six days...

Thnks fr th mmrs.

Wed, 31 Jan 2007 02:45:24 GMT

OH.
MY.
FUCKING.
GOD.
I have a new Fall Out Boy song.
Thnks fr the mmrs.
I love this song.
No doubt, I hate the title, In my opinion, it should be spelled out.
But dear jesus.
It's amazing.
It made me CRY.

This song's soon to become one of those like Side Effect of Cocaine and Note to Self.
It's one of the best songs I've ever heard Fall Out Boy do.
And Patrick's vocals are ASTOUNDING.
Yeah, they're in the middle range, but rest assured, I'm going to be bugging you all with this little darling for a few days at least. :D

I'm gonna make you bend and break
Say your prayers
but let the good times roll
In case god doesnt show
(let the good times roll
let the good times roll)
And i want these words to make things right
But its the wrong that makes these words
come to life
Who does he think he is
(if thats the worst you got you better
put your fingers back to the keys)

One night and one more time
Thanks for the memories even though
They werent so great
He tastes like you only sweeter

One night yeah and one more time
Thanks for the memories
Thanks for the memories
See he tastes like you only sweeter
ooooooooh

And looking forward to the future
But my eye sight is going bad
And these crystal balls
Its always cloudy except for (except for)
When you look through the past
(look into the past)
One night stand (one night stand, oh!)

One night and one more time
Thanks for the memories even though
They werent so great
He tastes like you only sweeter

One night yeah one more time
Thanks for the memories
Thanks for the memories
See he tastes like you only sweeter

They say I only think in the form of
Crunching numbers in hotel rooms
Collecting paychecks lovers
Get me outta my mind
Gets you out of those clothes
I learned my way of getting you
Into the mood (wa-ooooohhh)

One night and one more time
Thanks for the memories even though
They werent so great
He tastes like you only sweeter

One night and one more time
Thanks for the memories
Thanks for the memories
See he tastes like you only sweeter

Pete's lyrics are amazing.
I can't wait until feburary sixth.

SEVEN DAYS UNTIL INFINITY ON HIGH!

And I'm definitely back guys.

Tue, 30 Jan 2007 01:56:54 GMT

THREE WORDS:
THRILLER
IS
AMAZING.

Fri, 26 Jan 2007 21:18:21 GMT

ACTUALLY! YOU KNOW WHAT? I JUST WANNA TELL BRENDAN MEEKS THAT I LIKE HIM AND SHIT. SO YOU KNOW WHAT? I HOPE HE FINDS THIS, KTHXBAI!

It's just shitty.

Fri, 26 Jan 2007 21:14:37 GMT

Dude
I want to
Kill several people
and tell several people how much
they mean to me.

End of story.
It's just
shitty.

Fri, 26 Jan 2007 17:03:22 GMT

I think I'm going to rip someone apart piece by piece.
I really want to tell a lot of people how I feel about them.
Like how I think one person's a jerk.
And how one's too cynical.
And how one's too GODDAMN EMO.
And how one's my best friend and I love her even though my trust with her's been broken 43453648687 times.
And how I want to ask him out so badly.

It's pathetic.
I just want two of them to fight so badly and rip each other's hair out and be targeted like I am all the fucking time.

You know what?
I'm tired of pleasing people
Fuck this, I'm getting offline and doing my "responsiblilities."
I'll update more in a bit when I'm not so fucking pissed off that I'm using fuck every other word.

I've gotta stop fucking cussing.

You'll be the tenth girl on my list.

Mon, 15 Jan 2007 22:39:56 GMT

Today was totally a waste of my time.
I spent the whole day thinking about what to put in here, but I couldn't think of anything, because I'm stupid and boring, and you know what?? I feel kind of sick. Yeah, that's right.
Aren't I just fucking amazing??

Ugh, I really need to stop cussing, and I really need to get some parents that aren't like, Hitler and Hitleretta.
Hitleretta. LAME!

I was going to go to the mall today with Megen, but nooooooooo. I can't have fun on my day off.

It's kind of okay though, I mean, I got some stuff that I actually needed.
Like a shirt that isn't black.
Some slip ons that I can wear and won't fall off on the stairs, so I won't trip over myself, drop my books, and make a total jackass of myself in front of him.
And a stud belt. Okay, maybe I didn't need a stud belt, but I like them, and it's the most fitting belt I've EVER had, so you know what? I don't care.
And a hoodie, that's long enough to be a dress. It's really warm and stuff, I'm wearing it right now...

So yeah.
I actually am not in a totally horrible mood, I'm just a little annoyed.
I'm really looking forward to seeing how my Number Twelve Looks Like You CD is. I love Texas Dolly, so the rest of the CD should be good too.

Hm. The only thing that dampers my day is that I think the guy in the music store where I bought my CD was kind of like, overly nice. Makes me think, 'pedophile, much?'

I think I'm going to go make a quiz... if I can think of something worthwile to make up.
So yeah.
That's it.
Boring, huh?

_ on a ___.

Sun, 14 Jan 2007 22:17:41 GMT

You fill in the blanks.
See, here's the thing.
Taylor Rae-Marie Patistas slept over at my house last night.
And we did cool stuff.
Like watch Snakes on a Plane and go for a walk at nine at night, play DDR, and watch teenage mutant ninja turtles.

It was fun.
And.
And.
And.

We snuck into that cemetery at the end of my street.
But we were really scared.
Because people kept driving up and down my street.

All we wanted to do was look at the gravestones.

So then we ran out and ran to the random field at the end of my street[the other end].
And we ran out and played in it.
And sat on fenceposts.
And took a crapload of pictures.

And then we ate popcorn and teddy grahams and drank diet soda and watched mother&*)(^%$ snakes on a mother@*%#)^! plane.

UGH.

Mon, 08 Jan 2007 02:33:28 GMT

I
fucking
hate
fucking
boyfriends and girlfriends and
fucking
myspace
and
fucking
emotions
and fucking
cussing
and
fucking
life.

Things were going so well too.

Laney Lung Cancer. says:
heyy.
Laney Lung Cancer. says:
guess what?
Laney Lung Cancer. says:
i've officially had the worst sunday ever.
Sorry it got messed but check it out anyway: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b13kB0hPKY4 says:
why?
Laney Lung Cancer. says:
because
Laney Lung Cancer. says:
dumbass extrordinarre on the east side of the US had to tell stupid boy that she liked him... and stupid boy says yes to ugly seventh grader's asking him out!
damn!
Sorry it got messed but check it out anyway: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b13kB0hPKY4 says:
Ouch.
Laney Lung Cancer. says:
fuckkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk.
Laney Lung Cancer. says:
and to boot: she hates me!!
Sorry it got messed but check it out anyway: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b13kB0hPKY4 says:
uhh
Sorry it got messed but check it out anyway: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b13kB0hPKY4 says:
O.o
Laney Lung Cancer. says:
i think i might claw her eyes out with a rusty fork.
Sorry it got messed but check it out anyway: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b13kB0hPKY4 says:
punch her?
Sorry it got messed but check it out anyway: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b13kB0hPKY4 says:
it isnt actually clawing then. its more like poking
Laney Lung Cancer. says:
fine.
Laney Lung Cancer. says:
DIG her eyes out with a rusty fork.
Sorry it got messed but check it out anyway: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b13kB0hPKY4 says:
Yeah. There you go.
Laney Lung Cancer. says:
stil
Laney Lung Cancer. says:
*still
Laney Lung Cancer. says:
her eyes will be forcibly removed with a rusty fork.
Sorry it got messed but check it out anyway: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b13kB0hPKY4 says:
Mhmm ...
Laney Lung Cancer. says:
either way i win.
Laney Lung Cancer. says:
I don't think he wants a girlfriend with rusty bleeding holes where her eyes used to be.
Laney Lung Cancer. says:
:]]] >D
Sorry it got messed but check it out anyway: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b13kB0hPKY4 says:
id spoon them out with .. well, a spoon. and then id stick brussel sprouts in replacement MOIAHAHA
Laney Lung Cancer. says:
hahaha
Laney Lung Cancer. says:
>D
Laney Lung Cancer. says:
rusty fork time.
Sorry it got messed but check it out anyway: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b13kB0hPKY4 says:
NOOOOOOOOOOOO
Sorry it got messed but check it out anyway: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b13kB0hPKY4 says:
RUSTY FORKS ARE SALAD FINGERS
Sorry it got messed but check it out anyway: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b13kB0hPKY4 says:
RUSTY SPOONS!
Laney Lung Cancer. says:
both.
Sorry it got messed but check it out anyway: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b13kB0hPKY4 says:
Rusty Knife?
Laney Lung Cancer. says:
HAHAHAHA.
Laney Lung Cancer. says:
THERE WE GO.

HAHA.

Sun, 17 Dec 2006 02:53:47 GMT

BrendanxgosRawer (9:38:41 PM): ha ha
BrendanxgosRawer (9:38:45 PM): its sooooooo funni
LaneyLoserface (9:38:59 PM): okay, it took you.
a minute and a half.
to write that.
BrendanxgosRawer (9:41:01 PM): idc
BrendanxgosRawer (9:41:02 PM): whore
LaneyLoserface (9:41:25 PM): don't call me a whore.
BrendanxgosRawer (9:41:26 PM): i ly
BrendanxgosRawer (9:41:30 PM): whore
LaneyLoserface (9:41:35 PM): ily too.
just don't call me a whore.
LaneyLoserface (9:41:36 PM): please
BrendanxgosRawer (9:41:37 PM): ok
BrendanxgosRawer (9:41:39 PM): im sorry
BrendanxgosRawer (9:41:43 PM): whore
BrendanxgosRawer (9:41:47 PM): ha
BrendanxgosRawer (9:41:49 PM): jk
LaneyLoserface (9:42:29 PM): :[
LaneyLoserface (9:42:33 PM): this is depressing me
BrendanxgosRawer (9:42:56 PM): im jk
BrendanxgosRawer (9:43:06 PM): ur like the least hoish person i kno
LaneyLoserface (9:43:34 PM): haha, thanks. :]
LaneyLoserface (9:47:25 PM): hey brendan
BrendanxgosRawer (9:47:25 PM): yes
LaneyLoserface (9:47:28 PM): are you a virgin
BrendanxgosRawer (9:47:30 PM): ha ha
LaneyLoserface (9:47:47 PM): are ya?
BrendanxgosRawer (9:47:53 PM): asphyxiatee: you're vrigin right?
BrendanxgosRawer (9:47:58 PM): ha ha ha
BrendanxgosRawer (9:47:59 PM): yes
LaneyLoserface (9:48:16 PM): okay
LaneyLoserface (9:48:18 PM): 'cause like
LaneyLoserface (9:48:21 PM): heather's all
LaneyLoserface (9:48:29 PM): brendan asked me about the dangers of sex.

friends.
i like them.

Gauges. :D

Sun, 17 Dec 2006 00:54:03 GMT

I got one today.
A gauge, that is.
I'm really happy too. I've wanted one for a while, so yeah.
idk.
I'm just glad.

I like someone.
I'm not really telling anybody within thirty miles of me.
So nah, I don't think I'll tell you.
I'm kind of being... secretive I guess is the word.
I like it that way.
So shove it.

Um.
My ear kind of hurts.
But I like the pain from it.
It's comforting.
If that makes any sense.
Maybe it's 'cause this time, I know the decision was all mine.
It wasn't influenced by anyone except for me.

And if my parents find out, I'm totally fucking dead.
I think.
I might not be.

But in any case, I'm hiding it for now.

Fersure.

Mon, 27 Nov 2006 21:41:53 GMT

Blahblahblah.
I'm bored.

I have a bunch of weird technoish songs stuck in my head.

I'm going to shut up and go talk to brendan elsewhere than my desk.

SQUARE BEAR!!!

Sat, 25 Nov 2006 23:18:48 GMT

I'm ovah at square bear's papas.
And it's the last day that he's gonna be in Virginia...
Or in this house.
Ahhhh the bittersweetness of it all.

'Cept our dear square is a bit too happy about it.
Ah well.
I posted my fanfic on gaia.
and enjoyed it.
apparently people think it's good.

Sorry haylee, spur of the moment decision.

More latahhhh.

Fri, 24 Nov 2006 19:52:27 GMT

Aw man.
My iPod just skipped.

I thought you might want to know.

Thu, 16 Nov 2006 02:12:14 GMT

So apparently "Carpal Tunnel of Love" means, numb and painful love. Because like, I don't know, I looked up Carpal and got Carpal tunnel syndrome and like. I was all, OH SNAP. Because carpal tunnel is where the eight bones in your carpal, AKA your wrist, cut off your circulation. It's like, a birth or genetic thing.

I think I might have it. DX

I'm really worried about Allison.
She cannot have menengitis.
She just can't.

I guess like, it's not fair.

Oh well.
I'm thinking about switching from P.E to study skills.
I would have a class with Ian then, and Brendan's in it. But Brendan's grades suck.
Butum.
It would be nice to have a class with him.
The boy is hilarious.

:D

Butum.
Today was day three in Christmas in november day.
And what good happened today?
Science.
And french.

I don't know what was so good about today, but I had a good day.

Except you people need to get on your computers and log onto aim, okay?
Okay.

Yeah, you all take boring to the next level.

Haha, losers.
Na, jay kay.

oh yeah.
I think wesley may be part girl. XD
He PMS's enough.

SO SQUARE BEAR LOVES A GIRL!
lawl.